Sexy Battle Girls

It doesn’t happen all that often, but sometimes I just don’t “get” the porno I am watching. Usually it’s because the movie is super artsy and full of random, interspersed images, or it’s a classic that evokes the sensibilities of a different time period, but sometimes it is just because the movie is from a different country. Now, I am definitely not trying to be ethnocentric or anything like that, I just… don’t get it. Maybe it’s over my head, or maybe I just don’t exactly understand what’s supposed to be going on, but this movie Japanese 80’s porno totally baffled me.

First, I thought this movie was about a ‘schoolgirl’ with a pussy that crushes things, because that’s what happened, but then it turns into some weird rivalry between the girl and the school bully, which culminates in sharp pens being thrown like darts at each other. Oh, and we also get an evil headmaster and a father that’s trying to keep that killer crushing pussy locked up. Yeah, makes so much sense, right?

Apparently this is a parody of a classic Japanese TV show (Yo-Yo Girl Cop), so might have made more sense to me if I knew anything about the real show. Without that context, I was totally lost. Usually that’s fine in porn, because there is hot sexin’ to keep me interested, but not this time. Softcore at its hardest points, I think I’ve seen more risqué stuff on prime time TV. I really want to understand what the fuck is going on (even the subtitles don’t help), but unfortunately, I think I just need to enjoy the weird “special effects” and take it as it is.

If you are braver than I, definitely give this weirdo a go.