Creature feature!

If there are two things I love to watch in this world it’s porn and horror. Put them together and I’m a happy girl.

Creature Feature gives a few vignettes of your tried and true generic horror flicks. Coming in at first place is definitely Bride of Fuckenstein. They definitely had fun with it and put everything they had into the scene. It was totally silly, but I loved it, all of it – the Halloween décor, bride’s store bought costume, but I mostly loved Evan Stone’s commitment to the Dr. Stein character. His opening monologue is fantastic. As he beholds bride’s brain, he is going on about sloppy blow jobs and ball sucking in his own brand of Evan Stone-ness. If you only watch a small portion of this movie, watch the first 5 minutes. The ball sucking dialogue and the look on Evan’s face when he says “it’s alive” is totally worth it. He is a guy that enjoys his job and it shows. I love when porn stars get into their characters, it makes me that much more interested in watching them fuck.

Okay, while this movie was entertaining and the sexin’ was decent, I have to say that the mummy scene was not a win for me. There was just something a little unsettling. I didn’t like the perfect hole that was cut out of the mummy’s pants that was just big enough to fit his cock through. Actually, I’m not sure if it was the hole or the khaki rubber pants that bothered me. Why not just wrap him in gauze? Why the pants? Either way, I just couldn’t get into it.

Regardless of pant choices, Creature Feature is a fun porno to watch to get you in the spirit of Halloween. While most people carve pumpkins and make candy apples, we peddle smut and think it’s the best way to get into the spirit! It’s not going to change your life, but this movie will give you a chuckle while simultaneously getting you all (chocolate covered) antsy in the pantsy.